16 - someone that's not in your state/country

caz grundy :)

she comes back tomorrow which is good, i've well missed her! she's been in pissing france for the past week and i've not been able to bug her for 25 hours a day, no bbming or anything *cries* i've missed our bizarre town trips, writing on tramps beds etc, etc :P it's fine though cos i'm going to make her come and see cats & dogs 2 with me, eeeeeh! :D

yaaaaaay

caz is back tomorrow, deffo gonna make her come see cats and dogs 2 with me, muahahah!

i've well missed her!

:D 

oh yeah...

apparently this is me, according to my parents and their friends, apparently i look like her, i don't act like her, pah, imagine! :')

i asked my mum and dad for plastic surgery so i could look like katy perry for my 19th birthday.

i'm now 19 and a half and i do not look like katy perry, FML.

hello special k diet, you're going to kill me.

hurryuphurryuphurryupHURRYUP.

saturday 20th november - we are scientists tickets :))))

i realllllllllly want to go to pride this year, kelis is playing on sunday but it's fine cos so is adam rickett :')

hmmmm.

15 - the person you miss the most.

dear you,

piss knows why i'm not putting your name, anyone that knows me properly at all will know exactly who i'm writing about on here but yeah... it's crazy how much i still miss you, it actually makes me feel sick. you weren't just my friend, you were the best of the best friends and everyone knew it. i don't know how we ended up becoming such good friends but it's one of the best things that ever happened to me. looking back now, the majority of my best memories are with you, most of me growing up is with you, it's really strange. k, so i just went on my old piczo site (lol.) and read some of the memory things that i put that we had and it honestly brought tears to me eyes :/ eurgh. you were the friend that my parents saw as another daughter, you would come to mine on christmas day night just because, family holidays, you were there, in two and a half weeks we spent fourteen hours apart without even realising, family birthdays and stuff, skipping school, college open days... everything, we did together. you saw me through some of the toughest things i've ever, ever been through and to this day, you know things about me that nobody else knows and that'll probably be how it forever remains, score. it pisses me off looking back now because i think that, at times , without realising it, i put a relationship before me and you but i swear i didn't realise i was doing that because me and you just came so easy, it was like family and we always knew that we were more important than any relationship. i remember you were the first person i came out as bi to, it was april 22nd in year 10 and we were in my room at my nanas and you should have been in german and i should have been in french and i told you about me and bexx and all i remember is you hugging me then asking if we could have chips for breakfast and 'did my nana have any decent pies in?', you'll never know how much that meant to me, you were there for me through absolutely everything. you were the kind of person that kept your distance in the dramatic situations that seemed to follow me around like mad but it just kind of worked that way, we weren't even in the same half year so hardly saw each other during lesson times and whatever but i'd get the 42 back to yours after school and just go and, well, be. i'll never forget when things all blew up though and for the first time, you switched and flipped out and came after me and i was like, wow, this is seriously incredible, i can't explain it but it meant the world to me that you went out of your way to look out for me, so much so that your persona changed. it killed me to see you go through what you went through, i'm not going to go into it because it'll really upset me but if i had to go back, given the chance again, i would have done it all the same because that's just how much you meant to me, you being healthy and happy was far more important than if me and you were going to remain how we'd been for so long, i know that sounds crazy but that's just how it is. when we really drifted apart, it messed me up so much, like, seriously, i was waiting for all relationships around me to just crumble to bits and whilst waiting for that to happen, i sort of ripped them down because i was too scared to wait anymore. we've not been the same for aaaages now, since like year 12 but i still really miss you and probably always will.

14 - someone you've drifted away from

i'm not in the mood to go into it, i don't want it all to be taken out of context, i just want it how it was before.

I MISS YOU.

"why do you have to be so cute? it's impossible to ignore you, must you make me laugh so much? it's bad enough we get along so well. one of these days, you'll miss your train and come stay with me, it's always say goodnight and go, we'll have drinks and talk about things and any excuse to stay awake with you..."

hah, imagine if i was bothered?! i'd probably be screwed, s'good times that i don't give a fuck :'D

i can't believe i just did this.

Pick your five favourite TV shows (in no particular order) and answer the following questions. Don’t cheat!

well they change all the time for me but atm

1. f.r.i.e.n.d.s
2. will & grace
3. sex & the city
4. coronation street
5. desperate housewives

Who’s your favourite character in 2?

karen!

Who’s your least favourite character in 1? 

um, dunno, probably joey, soz.

What’s your favourite episode of 4? 

corrie's not like that baaaabe.

What’s your favourite season of 5? 

um, i liked the one that's just been, simply cos it was so strange :')

What’s you favourite relationship in 3? 

carrie & big, forever!

Who is your anti-relationship in 2?

for a long time it was grace and leo, not sure why.

How long have you watched 1? 

um, i used to watch it in like, year six but i didn't understand what the chuff was going on :') i properly got into it as it was finishing, hah, score.

How did you become interested in 3? 

*shrugs* no idea but i'm a bit obsessed.

Who’s your favourite actor in 4? 

ooh! i absolutely love becky and steve :')

Which show do you prefer? 1, 2, or 5?

got to stay faithful to f.r.i.e.n.d.s, got love for all of them though.

Which show have you seen more episodes of; 1 or 3 

i've seen all of each of them, hi boxsets.

If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be? 

pah, someone from corrie?! i'm the cat in the credits me babe.

How would you kill off your favourite character in 1? 

imagine if phoebe or chandler got killed off?! i would die.

Give a random quote from 1. 

:') i could never just give one!

Would a 3/4 crossover work?

hah! corrie + sex and the city, imagine?!

Pair two characters in 1 that would make an unlikely, but strangely okay couple. 

chandler and phoebe, they would have the funniest kids, ever.

Has 5 inspired you in any way?

god, desperate housewives?! imagine! hah! 

Overall, which show has a better cast? 3 or 5? 

hm, satc or dh? i don't know, eeek.

Which has better theme music, 2 or 4?

corrie all the way!

ray lamontagne makes me happy, FACT.

:)

it's been a while since i did like, a normal blog... so yeah...

i don't know what's going on with me at the minute, like, seriously, don't feel like me anymore, it's so bizarre, i blame the broken dvd player, fml. quite a few lovely things have been going on though... i had my pizza hut and cinema date with lozza which was lovely, as per :) inception was utterly mind blowing, like, everything about it. i actually liked leonardo dicaprio in it, which kind of shocked me, even though i liked him in titanic and romeo & juliet, hm. joseph gordon-levitt was in it as well, i was so excited about that cos i utterly adored him in 500 days of summer but it turns out his character in inception bugged me a bit and he looked like spock, then there was ellen page and marion cotillard, i can't even, just, sh, i love them, seriously amazing film though. 

i went to poppy seddons for a bit last night which was so random but fun, i do enjoy my random trips out :') they're always so last minute and strange... me and poppy actually speak quite a lot, i'm not sure how or why or anything but we do and i think she is probably one of the sweetest people i've ever come across so yeah, fun. the night involved pure chills, cider, my phone being dropped completely into a cup of cider, music channels, michael jackson, tattoos, hash browns, ketchup, mcfly, gag, blahhhhhhhhhhhh, celine, obvs, pure in depth conversations with shannon, ipod times and roaming the streets alone at 1am; bliss... i followed this by watching wild child at like 2am alone :') why is my life such a chuffing joke?!

it was my daddys birthday today, well, yesterday, sh. 28th july :) me, my mum and dad randomly went out for some food which was really nice, i quite like having time with just them two, it's strange, being allowed into their world a bit, i know that sounds really odd but i love it so much. so yeah, cheeky bit of food with the 'rents and a glass of wine or two (hello crazed head aches, god.) then we went to the pub and met doug and steve who my dad went to school with and they just played pool and we all sat speaking and having a drink for a bit and it was just such a chill, i loved it, really, really loved it. 

13 - someone you wish could forgive you

i can't think of anything that i need forgiving for, wow.

hah, watch that just be me being all up myself and stuff :') 

i'm quite good in the sense that if i'm in the wrong then i'll admit to it and stuff.

christ, i used to spend my life saying 'sorry' for the silliest of things, i forgive myself for doing that (:

wantwantwantwant

- my tv to sort it's pissing life out

- more moneyyyy

- we are scientists tickets 

- my ears pierced again

- new flats and new dunksss

- more sega games (!!!)

- a video player

- more tattoos; 'the dog days are over' on my back and '∞' on the back of my neck

- my lip pierced; wanted this for like, almost 3 years but i'm too much of a shitbag, it'll probably remain that way :')

i am currently addicted to the xx.

12 - The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

hating is just a complete waste of effort.

there was a time when i could have sat here and typed and typed and typed about how much crap one person has given me but at the end of the day, i played a big part in it as well and there's not much point dwelling on it. it's strange cos when i think of people who've hurt me the most, that person doesn't even come into the equation :')

three people have caused me so much pain but shit happens, build a bridge, get over it.

11 - a deceased person you wish you could talk to

eurgh, i hatehatehate the word deceased, ick.

roisin gustafson - nana rose / nana gus ♥

if i had my way, i'd want to talk to my nanas mum and dad, jack and nancy, my grandads dad, thomas, my dads dad tim and pete but when i saw this post thing, i instantly thought of my mum's nana, rose.

 this is the only picture i have of her on my laptop. she died like, two years ago now i think? because she's from my mums side, she's a pure scouser and is probably one of the funniest people i've ever had the privilege of meeting. she was the last of my great grandparents to pass away which basically means that i was able to actually get to know her. she was like, the heart of my mums side of the family and she'd do absolutely anything for anyone. when she died, i was old enough to understand what was going on and i was pretty broken about it because i'd never got to say goodbye to her, i'm quite lucky in the sense that i've never lost anyone exceptionally close to me because i know that there were people in my family that were much closer to nana gus (that's what i called her, pahah!) than me, like my mum for example, but in my eyes, the pain of having to watch someone you are close to (my mum, my mums brother, my grandad...) lose someone they're really close to, that kind of has a league of it's own if that makes sense? i'd love to be able to sit and talk to her again so i could tell her about the kind of person i am now, i'm so different to how i was a couple of years ago, i'd tell her about the kind of person i hope to be, i'd find out more about her, because everytime i did find out new things about her, it was incredible, then i'd make sure she knew how happy she made my family and how she had such a big influence of all of us. ♥

10 - someone you don't talk to as much as you'd like to

my sister, hayley

she's four years younger than me but she's really grown up and if she wants something, she's going to get it. she can be such a bitch at times and we never used to get on but that's kind of changed now. we've never been exceptionally close but when we were younger, we used to play together and stuff and i liked having a sibling who wasn't too far from my own age and stuff although at the time the age gap seemed much bigger than it is now. we've been through a lot together but she's one of those people who don't like talking about feelings much and stuff, i think she takes after my mum quite a lot in that aspect but if anyone was to hurt her, well, let's just say, that doesn't come close to what i'd do to them. i value both her and my brother, and the rest of my family for that matter, since going to uni because i don't think i take them for granted as much as i used to and now we're not together as much as we were before, we actually choose to spend time together instead of being forced to but i kind of wish we could talk about stuff even more and i hope that we'll start to.

09 - someone you wish you could meet

florence welch.

there's so many people i'd absolutely love to meet but florence just goes above everything.

florence and the machine are like, my favourite band, it's pretty far beyond obsession if i'm being honest. florence welch is absolutely out of this world, utterly incredible. i think everything about her is immense, the fact that her voice isn't perfect, it's so different, she looks strange and i think it's really enticing, her voice gives me goosebumps and lungs is my favourite album EVER. i've seen her live twice and she is absolutely mesmorising. every single one of her songs drags out emotions from within me that i didn't even know i had, a lot of her songs have made me look at things so differently, i mean come on, how mental is that?! it's fine though cos my next tattoo is 'the dog days are over', couldn't be more excited if i tried! so yeah, plus, on top of all of that, she seems like a bit of fun, we'd get a massive dressing up box and dress up as loads of strange things all day then go get matching tattoos and get absolutely wrecked and dance like loons, heaven! : D

08 - an internet friend

i was really struggling with what the hell to put here but now i have the perfect solution...

kirsty holden :)

she goes to my uni and i've seen her around quite a lot, usually on blurry, messy nights out and me, just being me, smiley to everyone and just pottering along made a mental note of her cos she had a cool ear plug thing, yes, i observe the strangest things. so yeah, one night, well, early one morning at about 4am, i was slightly tipsy still from being wasted earlier on and pottered along to the kitchen at maggie b and ended up stopping in polly's room for aaaages cos, for some reason, kirsty was there with dom :') it was so surreal, ohmygosh! i remember now! it was the night lauren came to stay, it was literally about 4am and i was ranting about whether or not we had a new prime minister :') we ended up speaking about the labour party and then had a rrrreally in depth conversation about lady gaga, monsters together and all that ;)

so yeah, i have her on facebook and we randomly started speaking on it quite a lot and i started stalking my way through her tumblr (a lot of it is just pure heaven, not gonna lie :P) and then we started commenting lots. it turns out we kind of have the same brain - celine, cher, ellen page, ellen (!!!!), will and grace, meryl streep, bree and of course mother monster ;P - my gosh you can tell she brings out the gay in me!

 she's an absolute sweetheart and she is a very nice 'internet friend' - aha!

x.

e l l e n p a g e . . .